I went searching for my sex
As if it weren’t always with me
Foolish girl
First in tight clothes
I saw it in a boy’s eyes
Heard it in taunts
laced with adolescent wishes
I went searching for it
Then I thought
despite the clandestine guilt
one can only find in church
If God created the orgasm
what was wrong with praising Him?
So I pondered that while I looked
I couldn’t find my sex anywhere
At that point, I couldn’t even say it
And years passed
And choices were made
And consequences
And blessings
until I turned around
And walked back into
where I’d always been whole
And now, as I stand with my sex
My strong and strange sex
I am thankful for the search
Needless as it was
For the story it gave me
The duality me… a dragonfly and a geode.